Mitcham

Mitcham's not my favourite place, and to be honest, I am not sure why I went there today, but hey, it was all a bit surreal.

My ride started with a shopping trip into Sutton. Got what I wanted, and thought that as the weather was pretty good I would pop down to Burgh Heath and surprise the Stig. After we had lunch I set off home, but the A217 doesn't make that easy. From where we met you can't go North, and are forced south for about mile to the next roundabout. As the day was so good I decided to turn of the main road and double back through Kingswood and Banstead as that would be more fun. Instead of turning off I followed the road through Chipstead Bottom.

When I got to Coulsden I decided to head towards Croydon. My new job may require visits to offices there and I thought it would be worth checking out the layout as I rarely visit Croydon these days. Getting to Croydon was no trouble, but once there I found the maze of bus only and tram only roads took me away from where I wanted to be and heading for Streatham. I gave up heading to the office after several changes of course were thwarted by the road layout and instead head off towards home.

As I left Croydon I spotted a couple of fire engines up ahead. No smoke, but there were a load of firemen, a lot of water on the road, and an old building with an ancient faded advert painted on the side. It covered the whole of the side of the kebab shop where there obviously had been a fire, and said "Bryant and May matches - the smokers choice"!

From there I cut through the back streets towards Mitcham to find my way home. As I passed through Mitcham town centre, glad that so far no chav had thrown anything at me like last time I passed through, when an an old green hatchback parked by the side of the road suddenly pulled out without indicating. I took evasive action as he took off like a rocket with his engine screaming. Following at my own pace he soon disappeared from view, but I expected to catch up with him as I got to the next set of lights. When I got there I was surprised to find that he had smacked into the back of a white van!

Already the van driver and the hatchback driver were out of their vehicles. I was about to pull over and tell the van driver that although I didn't see the accident, I could give evidence that the perp had been driving fast and recklessly immediately before the accident. I soon changed my mind when he started beating the shit out of the perp - I really didn't want to break up the fight just to tell him how justified he was! Instead I kept on going, but about half a mile on I turned round. I decided they might have calmed down by now - instead when I got there both vehicles had disappeared, leaving no evidence of the crash. I didn't imagine it - they were there!